Four Twenty. Plus a week. Plus a day.

 

April 28, 2026 CE. Or Anno Domini, depending how you slice it.

 

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. I had started a record label with a friend from Harrisburg. I was spending the majority of my time in beautiful Montana. The economy was in the toilet. The political climate was awful. The Epstein list had come out, and everyone in power, from Hollywood to the Oval Office, was in there. AI was drinking up all our water. My personal future looked bright. The world's future looked bleak.

I knew not what to do with myself this day. I felt in some ways I had reached a kind of internal milestone this last winter, one of knowing my self-worth and knowing I would not compromise it for anyone or anything. This was a difficult and stressful lesson to learn, one I felt I should have learned long ago, but it did not matter. My internal voice no longer nagged me with doubts of if I was good enough. Simply by living and breathing I was good enough, dammit. 

So now that I had won this huge internal struggle that I had never told anyone about, what was the next step? I felt a huge rush of energy, the kind that comes when you summit a peak in life you previously felt unattainable.

Celebrate, I guess? Celebration felt hollow. Celebration had been my favorite coping mechanism to compensate for the hidden emptiness rotting me out from the inside.

Besides, there was too much work to be done. I wanted to get some DJ gigs, meet some cool people. Make more vinyl and merch.

 

 

 

In astrology, they often speak of a Saturn return, a period that lasts through your late twenties to early thirties (and another in your late 50s/early 60s) where your old life is knocked to the ground and the universe forces you to begin anew. I felt in many ways that this feeling was symptomatic of this event being completed, as this insecurity I had always quietly carried with me was now replaced by a silent, peaceful confidence that said I was enough without any question or second guessing.

 

What was I to do with this feeling?

 

Interrupt the signal. Create human connection in a world that only wants clout. Make something beautiful in a world of ugliness. I dunno. Was it cliche? Yeah. Was it better than sitting around and watching the world turn to slop? Yeah. I choose to keep raging against the dying of the light. lol

 

If u like what I'm doing, support here.